16/04/2021
Chennai

Dear Appa,
Well and wish to hear the same from you. Appa I have written few letters to you and you have always replied to them. But this one is very special because you are not going to reply to this letter, but I still pen it down to reduce the heaviness in my heart. Appa my life’s most beautiful days are the ones which I spent with you. I couldn’t forget the day when I entered my teens and your wishes with a glowing smile. I can’t forget the day when I turned 18 and the beautiful birthday gift you gave me. It brings a smile to my face till now Appa. I can’t forget my deepest sorrow when you left this world when I was 21. Appa you never let me see a dead body passing close to me, but when I saw yours in front of me, I was shattered completely. Appa first I was in disbelief that you are sleeping, after some time I consoled myself saying you are living away from me. But it took years for me to understand that I can’t see you any longer with my eyes and can’t hear you calling me “Krupa”.

As the years pass by your love, affection and advice were the tools to overcome my problems appa. After you left me I started to stay alone, you knew that no one can understand me as much as you did Appa. I can’t forget the days we played shuttlecock, chess and also the day you taught me driving. I always enjoyed your special concession for drinking water and no one believes me when I say that you have beaten me only once. Whenever I wake up with the ringing sound of my alarm clock, my mind always reminds me of your kind voice calling me ” Krupa எழுந்துடுமா ( Krupa wakeup)”.

The one piece of advice you gave me when I was young is that ” if you didn’t get what you like, like what you get”. I have understood the meaning behind it but still, have difficulty in accepting it Appa.

The days you cracked jokes and share some funny incidents are etched in my memory. I have always been an admirer of the funny names you called your coworkers and any random passerby.
One of the good thoughts which you have instilled in me, that makes me feel good under all circumstances is that “an idle mind is a place for devil’s workshop”. Appa, to date I have never kept my mind idle – this has yielded me so many good things in life. When I was young, I never thought about a life without you, but today I have to lead a life in your absence with a heavy heart Appa.

The one thing that makes me upset is that – after you left was that you never told me how horrible this world is! All I knew was to do only good to people. But when people fooled me, laughed at me, exaggerated my faults, talked bad about me – I was clueless Appa. I struggled a lot in my life, to overcome these poisonous people. It took years for me to identify them. This is the one thing which you never talked about to me. I always liked your smiling face, which I miss a lot now appa. These 20 years were very terrible for me Appa, I know positivity is the key to lead my life. But still, I miss
• your affection,
• your kind words,
• your guidance,
• your smiling face,
• your jokes,
• your support &
• your sweet voice.
What I miss the most is, calling you ‘Appa’.

Appa if I have a rebirth I wish to be your daughter again.

Your ever-loving daughter,
Krupa

P.S. ( Appa you are a gem of a person, who can’t be replaced by anyone.)